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quote over a pink flower on a lily padWhat if the man you are longing for loves someone else?

I am dedicating the next few weeks on my blog to answering questions women ask.

A reader recently asked me: “Is it worth being in a relationship with someone who may be in love with someone else but whom he cannot be with?”

My heart breaks at this question because it tells me another woman out there is lonely in love to the point that she will settle. It’s not her fault. She’s been made to believe that if she tries harder, or sticks in there longer, or loses more weight, or changes her behavior in some way, this man will begin to love her, or love her more, or love her once again.

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Do you ever stumble upon something from years ago and find that it still touches you today?

I recently found an old  journal I kept during my high school and college years and discovered that what I wrote about my God 30 years ago still applies to His character today.

That tells me that although our situations change throughout the years our God never does.Though we may have forgotten certain heartaches or experiences in which we needed Him, He has not.

I hope this is a gentle reminder to you, too, that His love for you is still constant, His forgiveness is still faithful, and with all that you’ve been through, He is still the Friend who sticks closer than a brother:

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Father-daughterEvery year around Father’s Day I get emails from women about their fathers.  They felt either abandonment, rejection, abuse, or indifference from their fathers. It breaks my heart.

But I have seen God come through in amazing ways for the woman who has always longed for a father’s love.  Every year around this time, I post an article reminding my readers of God’s “Father heart” for us and every year it is my most-read post.

So, let me encourage you again this year with how God wants to more than make up for what you may have lacked in a loving father here on this earth.

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Do you ever feel that you’re not doing enough to please God?

I recently asked a group of women how their spiritual life was going. They each frowned and began to recount to me all that they had not been doing. They were each concerned about  not praying long enough, not reading the Bible consistently enough, and not doing enough in their overall efforts to please God.  I’m sure they all thought they were getting a “C” from God for simply being average…if not an “F” for failing. read more

Having faced rejection from an abusive father, abandonment from an abusive husband, and then betrayal by a boyfriend she thought was the “real deal,” Becky asked “What’s wrong with me?”

But Becky, as many of us do, was asking the wrong question. The question is often not “What is wrong with me?” but “What is wrong with this representation of ‘love’?”

At the root of our hurts, as women, is what I call “distorted love.” We thought it was real. But then we were burned. We trusted it as love, but discovered it was manipulation. Sadly it can take several years, multiple relationships, and countless scars  to finally realize that true and perfect love exists only in the One who is truly perfect: Jesus Christ.  read more

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