As Valentine’s Day approaches, it can be a lonely time if you’re single, divorced, widowed, or often disappointed from unmet expectations. 

So, I want to encourage you this week and next. Instead of wishing you had a husband who knew exactly what you were thinking and was able to anticipate your needs at any time, and instead of longing for someone whom you can depend on to always be there for you no matter what…here is a new strategy. 

What if you were to focus on your “spiritual husband” this Valentine’s Day? Whether you’re married or not, if you know God, through a relationship with Jesus, you already have the perfect husband. Isaiah 54:5 says “For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is his name…” Throughout the Bible, God uses the illustration of a bridegroom seeking his bride to describe His desired relationship with His chosen ones. That kind of pursuing love makes Him more than a Supreme Being whom we thank before meals and pray and sing to on Sundays. That makes Him a God who is intimately acquainted with us, perhaps even more than a husband on earth could ever be. 

Jesus wants to more than make up for what you never had in a husband, or be the perfect husband you may have been unfairly expecting your spouse to be. Whether you’re single, married, divorced or widowed, here are just four ways Jesus is your Perfect Husband: 

1. He will never disappoint you. 

You and I can’t say this about anyone else on earth. Every human being is fallible. Everyone will disappoint us at one time or another. Except Jesus. Your longing for the perfect husband can be satisfied in a relationship with the Perfect One. Psalm 18:30 says “This God—his way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true…” (ESV). That means Jesus will never disappoint you, or fail you in any way. You may not understand His ways, as they are much higher than yours (Isaiah 55:8-11), but He cannot act apart from His nature that is good, holy, righteous, and pure. Jesus truly is the Only One who satisfies. So, bring your expectations to the only Perfect One who is able to do “immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us” (Ephesians 3:20, NIV). 

2. He knows you better than you know yourself.

Wouldn’t it be nice to be completely known? To know that someone really knows you, what makes you tick, what thrills your heart, and what disappoints you? You might think – or maybe you’ve even heard someone say – “My husband knows everything about me.” Yet, no one can really know you completely, except your Maker. In Psalm 139:1-4, David sang, “O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar. Youscrutinize my path and my lying down, and are intimately acquainted with all my ways. Even before there is a word on my tongue, behold, O Lord, You know it all” (NASB, emphasis added). 

Think about that. God knows your thoughts before you think them, your words before you say them, and your actions before you carry them out. And He still chooses to love you. That is a mind-reader husband with whom you can feel safe. 

3. He’s the perfect listener. 

Do you ever want to pour out your heart to someone but you’re not sure how it will come across or how the other person will react? Will your words be received in the right way? Will you be misunderstood or, worse yet, labeled an emotional train wreck if the words don’t come out right? Psalm 62:8 tells us: “Trust in Him at all times…; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us” (NASB). That verse assures us that with Jesus there is safe communication. You don’t have to walk on eggshells or close yourself off because you don’t know how to verbalize what’s on your heart and say it just right. With Jesus as your “safe place” you can say whatever is on your heart and mindand know you are accepted by your Beloved.

4. He is always available. 

Even a husband with the best intentions cannot always be there for his wife. Life happens. The job and responsibilities call. There are aging parents to care for or fires to put out on his job. But in Jesus you have a husband who has always been there for you and always will. Psalm 139:7-12 assures us there is no place we can go where He is not and no place we can wander where He will not follow. He goes before us, walks alongside us, and has our backs. That is a love that is ever available and always there for you. 

Next week I’ll give you three more ways Jesus is the perfect husband. But for now, I’d love for you to let me know in the comment section below which one you’ll be focusing on this Valentine’s Day. (In the meantime, fall in love with your Perfect Husband all over again with my devotional book, When God Pursues a Woman’s Heart, on sale now through the month of February.)