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Stop Believing You Can Never Change
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Spiritual Growth

Stop Believing You Can Never Change

September 11, 2018
-
Posted by Cindi

Are you letting your past mistakes define you?

Do you find yourself believing that you will always be a certain way?

I’ll admit it. I’ve found myself saying, at times, “That’s just the way I am.” But I realize now how pathetic that sounds.

Maybe, like me, you’ve found yourself saying things like:

  • “I have control issues. That’s just the way I am.”
  • “I am an adult child of an alcoholic and I struggle with certain dysfunctional behavior. That’s just the way I am.”
  • “Because of what I’ve been through in my past, I’ll always be insecure. I’m just that way.”
  • “I will never trust another person. That’s just the way I am.”
  • “Sorry I got so defensive. You should know I’m just that way.”

A sure sign that we are stuck from pain in our past is when we excuse our behavior by saying “That’s just the way I am.” Or, when we continue to believe that we can never grow beyond a certain place, emotionally or spiritually.

Here’s how you can change for the better.

In my book, When a Woman Overcomes Life’s Hurts, I point out that a crucial step to healing and wholeness is to renew your mind to think differently. If you have a relationship with God, the old you that was “just that way” is gone. And the new you is one who is “just like Him.”

In Galatians 2:20, the Apostle Paul says this, which I believe is a great motto for our lives: “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” And our song of newness is found in Second Corinthians 5:17: “…if  anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!”

So why are we not living like the new, regenerated creature? In my life, I’ve found that it’s easy to go back to the old way of thinking if I’m not making a conscious effort to remember who I really am and to redirect my thoughts.

Here are two practical ways you and I can renew our minds and receive our new identities — the ones that are just like Him:

  1. Let God Define Who You Are – This happens when you get into God’s Word and understand what He is saying to you through the Scriptures. Let God define who you are — not your parents, your past, a teacher from long ago, a friend who used to criticize you, a boyfriend or husband who walked out on you, or a boss who thought you weren’t capable of much. The more you read of God’s description of you, the more you will begin to see yourself as a regenerated, transformed child of His and act like it. Get into God’s Word and see not only how He sees you, but how to start living like His child.
  2. Lock Up the Negative Thoughts– In order to let God — and not the voices in your head — define you, you must learn to bring “every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5). When you hear negative thoughts from your head defining you, capture them — instead of letting them run loose. Be determined to only hear the thoughts that are obedient to God, the thoughts that are consistent with His Word’s description of you. Tune your ear to hear the thoughts of God’s that say:
  • “I have loved you with an everlasting love…” (Jeremiah 31:3).
  • “I have called you friends” (John 15:15).
  • “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2).

Who are you really, my friend? Renew your mind— and receive your new identity — with the beautiful descriptions of you found in God’s Word. And walk with your head higher, focused on the fact that you are not just that way. You are, instead, just like your Heavenly Father.

For more on discerning God’s voice and living in the confidence of the new you, see my books,  God’s Whispers to a Woman’s Heart and When a Woman Overcomes Life’s Hurts.

September 11, 2018
6 Comments
Cindi
Cindi McMenamin is an award-winning author and national speaker who helps women find strength for the soul. She has nearly 35 years experience ministering to women and inspiring them to let God meet their emotional needs, grow stronger through their alone times, and pursue their dreams with boldness.
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6 Comments

on Stop Believing You Can Never Change.
  1. teresa webster
    September 12, 2018 @ 6:55 pm
    -
    Reply

    My name is Teresa. I like what you say to women. Sometimes I feel that way. I had some kind of a stroke in 2004 and in 2009. I don’t know why,but what the doc told us was that I was not going to live in 2004, but I did. I’m surprised but some times I feel real down, not for long.

    • Cindi
      September 12, 2018 @ 7:49 pm
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      Reply

      Teresa: Thank you for taking the time to comment on my blog. It sounds like you are a living miracle! 🙂 Immerse yourself in God’s Word and as you continue to see who you are in His eyes, it will keep you in perspective and, prayerfully, from feeling low.

  2. Marybelle McMillan
    September 13, 2018 @ 12:30 am
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    Reply

    Thank you for your messages. You are helping many and some do not respond to say you are so kind ,gracious and that they enjoy your books that constantly reach out to needy ones.I want to congratulate you for your expertise. Mucho thanks to you for me and everyone that has benefittted.

    • Cindi
      September 13, 2018 @ 4:59 pm
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      Reply

      Thank you so much, Marybelle. I truly appreciate you taking the time to let me know my books and blogs have helped and encouraged you. I am so grateful. 🙂

  3. Christal
    September 16, 2018 @ 12:49 pm
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    Reply

    Fabulous! As I pray today I discovered you Cindi and in reading this one blog of yours the guidance came to me in your words. Needed to let you know you will be in this girls spiritual venture now for good! You put together the words and message from God in a way that I am sure helps so many of us understand better. Thank God and thank you Cindi!

    • Cindi
      September 16, 2018 @ 9:26 pm
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      Reply

      Hi Christal,
      I’m glad you found my site. Thank you for taking the time to let me know my blog this past week has helped you. Many of my blogs and writings are based on my books so you might want to check them out. Thanks for your encouragement.

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