Are the circumstances of life robbing you of true joy and contentment?
Then my friend, Diane Markins, has some encouraging words for you. Having suffered through her own set of difficult circumstances, she still radiates with joy. She is my guest blogger this week. And if you leave a comment at the end of her blog you could win a copy of her newest book, Contentment Connection: 75 Ways to Grow Joy and Satisfaction.
Here’s Diane…
Contentment is a word that brings to mind a cozy blanket on a cold day, a cat purring on your lap, a warm beverage by a crackling fire…
But contentment isn’t just a Hallmark Christmas movie. It’s a way of thinking and being- every day.
I know that Cindi McMenamin gets this. We share a belief that contentment is possible regardless of the chaos, pain and fear that pops up on any given day.
I’m not just talking in abstract terms. Personal experience bears this belief to be true. In August of 2017 I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I’ve had three surgeries and may be looking at more. I’ve been getting chemo treatments since October. I lost a lot of hair, including eyebrows and lashes. I’ve had days filled with pain and almost no energy. Yet I haven’t lost my contentment.
A few weeks ago my father-in-law was going about his regular routine and busy life. He suddenly collapsed, feverish and incoherent. It was determined that he had an infection in his leg (that may have started with a little bug bite!). After battling for a week in the hospital we had to allow doctors to remove his leg above the knee to save his life. He and my mother-in-law have never wavered in their faith or lost their contentment.
Several dear friends are fighting cancer. They are fatigued, in pain, and consumed with the treatments ahead and financial burdens. Each of us knows “our numbers”… statistical likelihood of cancer returning. One sweet friend just found out it’s back, now in her bones and stage four. She is a single mom of six-year-old twins. Every day she has to do a re-set to live in contentment, but she does it by choice.
Life has so many unexpected challenges for each of us — illness, death of loved ones, prodigal children, broken marriages and financial stress are just a few. But First Peter 4:12-13 says, “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.”
I’ve come to see that in our culture discontentment is the norm. People are just not satisfied with what they have. We confuse contentment with success or beauty or possessions. “I’ll be content when I get: that fancy house, bigger breasts, a faster car or a new spouse.” The big problem is that once we get that thing we desire most, something else in our life is lacking and we repeat the cycle.
The Bible tells us to let our convictions, not our circumstances or unmet desires, rule our sense of contentment. True biblical contentment is a belief that Christ’s good purposes, power and provision are enough for every circumstance.
First Timothy 6:6-12 says, “But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.”
In my little book, Contentment Connection: 75 Ways to Grow Joy and Satisfaction, I share tips that will re-direct your thoughts and actions away from longing, hopelessness, and dissatisfaction- toward joy, hope and full contentment. I share ways to stop striving for contentment and learn to simply experience and embrace it as the gift God gives us every day.
I pray that you will take a look at your level of contentment and intentionally change course if this is a struggle you face. The Lord’s promises apply to you!
In which area of your life is it most challenging for you to be content? Let Diane and Cindi know in the comment section below (along with the U.S. state in which you live) and you could win a free copy of Diane’s little book, Contentment Connection.
Diane Markins
is a sought-after writer and platform speaker, especially for “tweenior women” (between 30 and 65). As a recent breast cancer warrior, she has been living out her mantra: “Contentment in All circumstances.” Diane’s stories will inspire and motivate you to trust the Lord as you face your own challenges. She has two Amazon Kindle best-selling books, Women in High Def and Contentment Connection (designed as a gift of encouragement). Married to her high school sweetheart in 1979, Diane has two adult children and five little grands. For more info or to purchase her books, go to http://www.dianemarkins.com/published-work/
We lost our son in a car accident 13 years ago who would be 45 & We have a 42 year old son who is mentally challenged & lives with & goes everywhere with us. It’s difficult to try and go somewhere without him, which is ok to bring him but then we’re having huge challenges with his behavior & it makes everyone uncomfortable so we don’t always go. No grand babies like all our friends have. Life is tough but I get up & do what I need to do every day.
Oh Sweet Gerry, God is acquainted with all the details of your life. As you praise Him in spite of those difficult circumstances, His Son not only empathizes with you because HE has been there, but His Spirit will lift your heart. In His presence, is fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11), so stick close to Him. He is staying right there with you. 🙂
Thank you for those words! I need to remember to ALWAYS look for the light at the end of the tunnel. That is when inner light becomes your pilot light. Blessings to both of you today.
Gerry,
I can’t tell you how sorry I am. I have seen how good God is, especially in the worst of times. Praying that He comes to meet you where you are right now.
Thank you, for your encouragement. I have several chronic pain issues and I’ve just been diagnosed with a couple more issues. I really needed this today.
Vicky, thank you for letting us know. Diane and I are so encouraged to hear it. God’s timing is always perfect.
Learning I can’t control a blessed thing! Choices our children make, extreme illness of family member and no signs of recovery, financial struggles, world situations. My gut reaction is to escape…avoid…or question God and have doubt and fear instead of trust and joy, regardless of what is happening. I know it is due to my wrong-thinking and attitude. The Lord says we will have peace and joy but somehow I seem to be choosing discouragement and sadness. I am now in the process of allowing the Holy Spirit to reveal things and change me…and I am SO eternally grateful to know that the Lord doesn’t love me any less. HE is with me through this process. What a Saviour!!!! Thank you for what you have written. HE is using it to help me overcome! God bless you! Isn’t HE so faithful!!!!!!
Thank you for your sweet, honest comments, Marye. I know Diane, the author of the blog, will be happy to see them. 🙂
Cindi and Diane!
Wow, this is a topic that is always relevant in every season of life!
Currently I am a mom of 4 and licensed family home provider for 6 more children here in Illinois. Life is busy to say the least 🙂 This morning my husband and I had a conversation about family planning. Are we putting ourselves in God’s place? Why is it so hard to trust God for the unknown? Why do I feel selfish for wanting to put myself first and pursue my Masters in Counseling degree? I just want to work hard and get my body back! If I’m honest, I am struggling in this area of my faith walk because somewhere I am not content. I am ready to “take control” and pursue my own goals, because I’m not content with where I am. Thank you Diane for your honesty and transparency. I am unraveling this onion and I appreciate the Holy Spirit leading me to this article and helping me see the root of my unsettled heart.
Thanks, DeAnna, for taking the time to share what you did. 🙂
Thank you for sharing your encouraging faith! It has Blessed me today, reading this! My prayers for healing and favor for you and those who are battling in this life!
LOVE Diane’s guest blog and follow u daily, Cindi. I try to strive for TRUE contentment in all circumstances daily. It definitely makes your heart and head feel lighter when you’re not constantly focused on the things of this world. Blessings to u both. <3
Thanks for following my writings, Robin. And thanks for reading Diane’s blog. We appreciate you.
Thank you for these words of encouragement. I feel really ashamed when I consider the things that I allow to steal my joy or cause me to become discontented when others are going through hard circumstances with joy and peace. I get discouraged and down because of the disunity within my church family. It saddens me greatly. To be able to trust God to work upon hearts and to stay in peace and contentment is a lesson I still need to learn.
Thanks for sharing your heart, Karen.
Such a great reminder to keep our eyes on Jesus not the height of the waves surrounding us while we weather these storms in life. I love when we can share from a place of total transparency,it makes our words so relatable and so much more powerful. Thanks Diane for sharing your gift of words and also your precious moments to remind us of whats really important in this tiny dot called life!
Just when I think that I’ve gotten a handle on choosing joy and contentment, the Lord brings another circumstance into my life and I get to learn how to do it all over again! Honestly struggled with some new fears over the past few months and was reminded again of how faithful God has been in the past and He is already in that future place that I have been worrying about! His grace is sufficient has been my mantra lately.
That’s a great mantra, Joni. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing such words of wisdom. To walk in contentment in the midst of difficult circumstances is a blessing.
Much love and gratitude 🙂
Thanks for reading and commenting, Tammy.
Love the words of encouragement Diane provides and the reminder to find the joy despite our circumstances. Having just recently been diagnosed with the very early stages of breast cancer, which runs in my family, and undergoing a bilateral mastectomy just this past week, attitude is everything. Has it been an emotional roller coaster, have there been times that I am worried or anxious…absolutely!! But from the day I was diagnosed I have felt very blessed it was caught in the early stages and tried to look at this as something I am supposed to go thru for some reason. During my times of worry, I am reminded the Lord knows everything about me, every hair on my head, every thought I have and has had this path laid out for me which brings me such peace. I pray this blog and her book brings peace and contentment to those who read it ❤
Thank you, Cindy, for taking the time to leave your comment.
great article…unless our eyes are focused on God it is difficult to be content. I would love to win that book to read and then share. 🙂
Thanks for your reply, Lynell.
Thank you for this! My name is Faye Jones. I’m from Arkansas. I’m a single 33 year old mother with 5 children. Oldest being 15 and my youngest being 3. I’ve often in my life asked God, why Im always going through something. Since I was Child, no relationship with my mom, growing up I was never told how pretty I am, she never hugged me or told me that she loved me. All through my years of growing up I’ve tried to win her love. I bought her things for her birthday she’d give them back to me. Talk about hurt! At this very moment it’s at a stand still. My Father was my rock growing up, or was when I got older in age after going through custody battle at age 12/13 because my step dad had made me feel uncomfortable and was abusive to my mom and touched on me and my sister, that my dad wasn’t the hero that I thought that he was. I suffered abuse mentally, I was every cursing word you could think of when he was drinking. He offered me a $20 bill, a condom and tax money, if I slept with him. Pushing forward from that time frame, I never knew was love was, so of course I went looking in ALL the wrong places. Thinking I could make men love me. Hitting some very low places in my life. I was raised in the church. We ate and slept church growing up so I was always aware of who God is. Just the relationship with Him, later on in my life I grew to understand was what I was missing. I’ve always been a hard worker, both parents taught me that. I’ve ALWAYS had my own. Forward up some more, now 3 out of 5 of my babies were almost rapped by people close to us at those times, just like me. Just like my mom who was rapped her entire child hood and is an incest child. Just like my granny and my aunt, my sister. My heart breaks bc it seems like things just keep happening to me! God gave birth to My Ministry in June 2017, Vessel Broken Ministry Women’s Group Study. It was birthed from Cindi’s book on healing and wholeness (When a Woman Overcomes Life’s Hurts). It was Only God that I received the first book, When Women Walk Alone. My son that was almost rapped 2016 Easter week, brought the book to me from his Angel Tree bag puzzled as to why he had it because it wasn’t a toy! ? I asked him to give it to me, and knew it was for me. I opened the book and began to read it and I couldn’t stop reading it. After finishing the book. I researched Cindi, started following her site and before I could end one book I was ordering another. Thank you Cindi! You are truly my God-sent Angel. Being in Ministry is hard! The devil has been on his job. Instead of content, I’m pushing the word persevere with myself and with my ladies that God’s given me. This blog touched me and was confirmation for me again! I had to share. I’m so sorry it’s long. Thank you both so very much! I refuse to give up on God, because I know he’s cheering me on at the finish line, waiting on me to come on in! ❤❤
Thank you, Faye, for sharing your story and your continued trust in your Heavenly Father.
Thank you for your authentic sharing. A great reminder about Gods faithfulness. You inspire me.
Thank you for the good reminder that contentment is a way of thinking and being everyday. When I wake up I quote Scripture to get my day started. One of my favorites is Psalm 118:24 “This is the day the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it.” The enemy comes to steal our joy and contentment to keep us from accomplishing our purpose. God has provided us with all the tools we need on this journey through prayer, Scripture, family, friends and the presence of the Holy Spirit in our lives. Thank you Jesus!
I struggle with contentment with my marital status. I’ve been divorced over 10 yrs. & it gets lonely. I’m trying to learn to let the Lord be my husband.
Wawoo. Thank you so much Cindi for such a beautiful life changing life experience. Surely contentment is a choice. You know this world can not give us all what we need, because the moment you get this, you heart yearns for another. I sometimes sit down and wonder what could really satisfy the human heart!!!. Nothing in this world. Husbands, children, wealth, parties all can not. We can only get this contentment which leads to joy and peace in the Lord Jesus Christ our Savior.
Am a minister of God, married woman for now 3 years, with twin daughters of 2 years old. But with so many life challenges in marriage full of fights now and then. But i decided in my heart that, I will never give up on my God the Author and Perfector of our faith. To have the contentment in our lives, we just have to look unto Him because this world will throw every kind of garbage to us but once we remain in the LORD, we shall be contented, full of joy and peace.
May God’s hand of healing touch you our Cindi that you may be healed completely. THERE IS NOTHING IMPOSSIBLE WITH HIM. – HE FORGIVES ALL OUR SINS AND HEALS ALL OUR DISEASES – 103:3 – 4. Be healed in Jesus Mighty Name.
Thank you for your kind and wise words, Kyolaba. And I know that Diane, who wonderfully wrote this guest blog for me, will so appreciate your prayer for healing in her life. I appreciate it, too. Blessings to you, my sister in Christ.
Hi Cindy
Thank you for the encouragement.My husband left me 2 years ago,l am looking after 2 kids without any support from him.He doesn’t even talk to the kids.I Thank the Lord for walking this journey with me.It was not an easy road, l still miss and pray that God will reunite us again.I sometimes feel so lonely and can’t find contentment.l continue to ask God to give me the peace he promises in his word.Thank you for your support and encouraging blog.
Thank you, Theresa, for sharing a bit of your journey so Diane and I can pray for you.You are not alone.
This really spoke to me! I’m from Nebraska. I reconnected with my grade school boyfriend 9 years ago (30 years after my family moved when I was 10). We both thought it was a “God thing” . We were blissfully in love & we married 8 months later. Our son was born 14 months after that. Things were a little rough after we got married but I chalked it up to normal 1st year of marriage issues as well as getting married later in life. A very long story short, I could not deal with his drinking, spending more time at the bar than at home, driving drunk & not coming home after work until 2am without even a phone call or text. This started about a year into our marriage. It was cyclical. It would get better for a few months, then the drinking would start again. Eventually, the bad days way outnumbered the good days. I did not want my 7yr old growing up in that environment. I didn’t want him to think this is what marriage is. Once divorce was decided, we actually got along great for a few weeks. Then, something chaged, I didn’t know what. We did a mediated divorce so once we met with the lawyer in January, the papers were filed a week later & the divorce was final March 28. The first weekend my son stayed with his dad, in mid March, I found out that my ex had a girlfriend & she stayed the entire weekend (my son told me after he came home as I was asking him how his weekend was). From that point on, the ONE night/week that my son spent with his dad she stayed with them or he took my son to her place & they all stayed there . I eventually discovered that he met her just days after he moved out. She was the change in January. They have since bought & moved into a massive house & are engaged. We only decided to divorce 6 months ago! At that time, he told me he didn’t think he was cut out for marriage. I felt no truer words had been spoken. He seemed sincere & honest. He also said he may be wrong & he may come crawling back to me. The past 3 months, he has been beyond cruel towards me (saying he only drank because he was so unhappy being married to me & he doesn’t need to drink anymore because now hes happy.) Both he & his girlfriend have told me I’m being inflexible with the parenting plan because I won’t switch weekends (I work the weekends my son stays with them, however, those weekends are opposite of her weekends with her teenage kids. They want all the kids on the same weekend). I am close with his parents & sisters &, again, both he & his girlfriend have told me I should not have a relationship with his family. I have told his family that I understand it it’s too difficult & I don’t want them to feel like they’re in the middle & they’ve all assured me I’m still family to them & they want me in their lives. So, finding joy & contentment during this season of my life has been a real challenge. I have primary custody of my son so I get up each day & be as positive as I can. He is my primary focus. I am grateful & blessed that he is healthy & I do my best to focus on my blessings rather than my burdens. I thank you for this post. I always pray that I hear God speak to me each morning as I read devotionals & I believe I heard him this morning!
I am struggling with adjustment to recent forced retirement due to physical age-related limitations. Daily devotion reading and exercise are helping me to start my day in a mentally and physically healthy way. Thanks for your encouragement through Faith scriptures and positive words.
Thanks for all the wonderful comments, shared experiences and honest insights. Isn’t it fantastic to know you’re not alone in this struggle? Contentment in tough times doesn’t come naturally. It takes discipline, intention and commitment. Only through God’s abundant grace are we able to fully realize what it looks like and how to get there.
My prayer is that the Lord blesses each of you an extra measure of grace-filled contentment.
I so much needed to hear this today…content with the circumstances as they are right now….this is a daily struggle for me, but I am learning day by day, taking baby steps. I am a single mom – my youngest son is 10 (almost 11 bday July 4th) he has 3 forms of juvenile arthritis, EOE and is autistic – as of right now they have ran out of treatments for him…in addition I have 2 adult children with spouses and 3 children a piece (6 grandchildren) – all 10 of them have multiple health problems….as if that was not enough I have all 3 parents with dementia, plus a sister with down syndrome who has dementia…and I live with my aunt who is 82 and she is aging daily…..girl my plate is full…but in the last few months I have been staying in my faith and praying a lot and I am learning to be happy where I am at in life and enjoy all the little things….in the past 3 months since losing my home I have learned that all those material things don’t really matter and can be replaced…but time is so valuable and can’t be replaced….I have been exercising more and coming out of my shell and trying to do more – I have met some wonderful people, lost some weight, tons of inches and just feel so much better…my prayers go out to you and your ministry.
For the last 3 years I have struggled so hard, lost all hope, joy, and contentment. I need this. So badly.
(Kentucky)
Darla, thank you for letting us know where you are struggling. You are in our prayers.
Well…I’ve read three things on contentment in two days…getting the hint☺
I think I struggle most with being content with my productivity. I’ve struggled immensely in that area since having children and slowly accepted this season. At times I’m challenged by my mom who takes the girls for a few hours or a day and asks if I ‘finished’…Monday my response was’I caught up where I needed to be for today. There’s always more to do because I’ve been behind for 7 years but I need to be satisfied with what I did do and move on.’ And for the first time no eye rolling! Will continue to give thanks for each day as He has ordained.
Thanks for your comment, Connie. Even though you wrote that you struggle with being content with your productivity, I happen to know that as busy as you are, you still take time to pray for others, myself included. I’m pretty sure God sees that as being far more “productive” than the other things we take time for, or feel that we’re running behind with. You inspire me. 🙂
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I love this post and I’d love to read your book.
The past several months have been overwhelming! It is a long story, but I will try & give you the short version. My mom (65) & I (45) always lived together (to help one another financially). I was making plans to move out but got some news to change my plans.
In November 2017, I found out I had a tumor on my kidney. My local doctor recommended me to go to see a doctor at John Hopkins Hospital. It scared me because 1. I have a tumor but 2. They are referring me to one of the better hospitals in the country…so I figured it was a serious matter. I get my surgery scheduled for Jan. 12, 2018.
While I wait (and worry) until then, my mom’s seems to be acting different. She lost her job of 15 years at a major retailer in this country. I was trying to help her find a job. She isn’t too computer savvy. So, I drafted her resume & was going online applying for jobs for her (after I worked my fulltime job.). Eventually, she is telling me I told her to do things that I didn’t, which confused me. I got so concerned for her I recommended to see her family doctor. He does bloodwork & puts her on an antidepressant. (I feel my mom has been depressed for years. She was sexually abused as a child. Her marriage to my dad was horrible as he cheated on her majority of their marriage.) The doctor wanted a CT scan of her brain. Results came back, she has dementia. The doctor’s feel she had a stroke summer of 2017. I was shocked & devastated!
Her condition leading up to my surgery is getting worse! I go in for my surgery which went great! Also, everything came back ok. No cancer! Thank you, Jesus! My mom was admitted to a local hospital for a UTI two days after my surgery. I had never seen her act the way she did. It was horrible! She was in the hospital for 10 days being treated for the UTI. The doctor & social worker were recommending she have 24 hr care. I have never gone through anything like this & didn’t know what to do but listen to the doctor. I tried to get my mom into one of the better nursing homes in the area but they didn’t accept her insurance and she doesn’t have enough money which makes me angry that is what it boils down to. This is my mom!!! There was a place 1 hr from my home that would take her. She was there for 1 week until I got her transferred to a place closer to me. She was there 3 weeks & then expressed she wanted to come home with me. My brothers (42 & 39) and sisterinlaw said they would help & check in on her. They have not full filled what they said they would do – help her. I have had to do everything for my mom from taking care of the house, paying her bills, making doctor’s appointments, giving her medication, applying for social security disability for her, taking her to church, etc. etc.
At times, I am overwhelmed, sad & angry! I don’t know what to do. Do I move out & hope my brothers will step up & help take care of my mom or do I remain with her & suck it up that this is my life? I would love to know how to find contentment of this roller coaster I am on.
My heart goes out to everyone that are facing GIANTS in their lives. God help us all.
Brenda, I am sorry things have been so difficult for you. Thanks for sharing your story. You will be in our prayers.
God bless you Cindi and Diane ?. I am so wonderfully overwhelmed by you words, spirit and guidance. Thank you.