Why Isn’t God Answering My Prayer?

Do you ever feel that God is ignoring you?woman-praying

I’ve had quite a few emails lately from women asking me why God isn’t listening, or why He refuses to answer their prayers.  Not knowing any background on those people asking the questions — or even what the requests were — I thought I should address this topic on “Why Isn’t God Answering My Prayer?”

In Scripture, God set some parameters around prayer that we tend to forget about.  And I think if we ask ourselves three questions, we can determine if we are within those parameters and if we can expect an answer to our prayers.

1. Am I in a relationship with God?  Only those who are “in Christ” have the privilege of asking  God for anything.

In the Old Testament, God sought out certain individuals (and eventually the nation of Israel) to be in covenant relationship with Him. It was these people He wanted to call upon Him for help.  And in many cases God  drew back His anger, or changed His mind about a situation based on a person’s prayers.

In the New Testament, Jesus taught His followers how to pray, starting with addressing God as their “Father in Heaven.”  Under both the Old and New Covenants, prayer was something that existed within a relationship between God and an individual.

There are many people today who think that because they simply asked God for something, He is obligated to answer their prayer favorably. But , we must be in right relationship with God in order to request anything of Him. And to be in right relationship with God, we must be trusting in His Son, Jesus, and what He accomplished for us on the cross through His death and resurrection. If you are trusting in Christ Jesus’  righteousness, and not your own, Scripture says you can “come boldly before the throne of grace” (Hebrews 4:16) and “in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God” (Philippians 4:6).

2. Am I asking according to God’s will?  God is not obligated to answer our prayers. He will answer only when our requests are in line with His perfect will.

Scripture says “if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us” (I John 5:14). Scripture also tells us “When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures” (James 4:3). (That’s not only the verse for everyone who prays that God will help them win the lottery, but it is a verse that reminds us we need to pray according to what God wants, not just what we want.) Scripture also says we must ask in Jesus’ name. That simply means to ask God for something that Jesus would ask for. Jesus sought His Father’s glory in all things. To pray according to God’s will means to pray that, in everything, God will be glorified.

3. Am I asking in faith?  Jesus told His followers “If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer” (Matthew 21:22).  This assumed that they were asking in accordance with God’s will. So the question is not just “Do I have faith that God will answer this prayer?” but “Do I really believe that He knows what’s best?” I’ll be honest…that’s the rub. Sometimes your definition of what is good is different than God’s definition.  God sees what is best for us — and others — in the eternal scope, while we can only see the here and now. In some cases, God might receive more glory by choosing to wait a little longer to answer your prayer or by answering “no.” But I hope you will trust that often His “no” is for our protection or for a greater good that we may not see this side of heaven. That is truly where your faith comes into play.   When we are convinced that God is good and loving, regardless of what He does, and He can be trusted with whatever He decides, then we will know how to pray and how to receive His answer — whether it is “yes,”  “no,”  or “not yet.”

What have you learned about the ability to wait, the ability to accept a “no” from God, or the ability to be persistent in prayer? I would love to hear from you.



About me

Cindi McMenamin is an award-winning author and national speaker who helps women find strength for the soul. She has nearly 30 years experience ministering to women and inspiring them to let God meet their emotional needs, grow stronger through their alone times, and pursue their dreams with boldness.


Nicole Blean
Reply June 18, 2013

Yes, I've been learning that God knows best. In fact, He knows me better than I know myself. Great article, Cindi! Your points about prayer are so true.

    Reply June 18, 2013

    Thank you, Nicole. It is a wonderful thing to pour out our hearts to God knowing that He knows even better than we do what we really need to be asking for. Thanks for sharing your heart.

Reply June 23, 2013

Thank you for this article/blog!! It has shown me yet once again about how beautifully amazing God's timing is. Just yesterday, I was praying with such intense urgency (on my part) to God and concluded in my heart that what I was asking ( or petitioning and slightly demanding) in prayer was something that God would absolutely agree "is good" for me. It seems as though ever since my fiancé and I began planning OUR wedding, we have been faced with unbelievable challenges. I was horribly stressed to the point where I took a medical leave of absence from work several months ago. I've always known what type of wedding I wanted small and intimate; however, because of not managing my stress well, I allowed others to incorporate their vision for OUR weddding. Before realizing what I allowed, I sent out wedding invitations and roughly two weeks later (after refocusing from a stressful daze) I rescinded the invites with an OOPS!..Change of Plans Poem cancelling our wedding. We WILL be married but now it seems without the presence of our family. I have since returned to work and am beginning to become slightly overwhelmed. Because I know myself well, I decided to pray and ask GOD to erase and renew my mind from any residue of this painful experience. After reading your blog, I realize that perhaps God has yet to get His glory from (what I consider to be) a horrible experience in my life. I DO KNOW that He knows what is absolutely best for me...and (as I write this with tears running down my face) I am willing that He gain His Glory out of my pain, as this is NOT my end. Please keep me in your prayers, as you will now be in mine

Thank you again for the blessing in your blog

    Reply June 23, 2013

    Thank you for your reminder to us that when God answers prayer it is sometimes for strength on our part to do what we need to do. Although we don't see an immediate "good" come out of it (except for the peace He provides that assures us we are in His will) He is perhaps growing our character and strengthening us for what is ahead. Thank you, again, for sharing your experience. God is with us in the difficult decisions and will see us through the molding, developing and strengthening that He allows to make us more like His Son.

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *